She told me they probably didn't live there anymore. We hadn't seen them since Halloween and even longer before that. But I was determined. He told me to find kids that wanted to play ball on Saturday. That's easy. I could hit up one street and fill the van in seconds. But I knew before I went anywhere else. I would see if my baby and the twins were home.
The wreath on the door screamed they didn't live there anymore. Usually there was always a piece of notebook paper taped up with a sign that said something like "no smoking" or "don't ring the doorbell cause the boys are asleep." But still I got out of the UI van and walked to the door. Size 3 football cleats met me there. I couldn't have smiled bigger.
When asked who it was I said my name and the door flew open. Squinted eyes and a smile to match mine appeared. Another head peeked around the door. Thank goodness they aren't too old for hugs yet. My heart was refilled and overflowing before I even made it into the living room. My whole heart was stolen from him years ago. And I'll never get it back.
It took me a long time to forgive momma. There aren't a whole lot of things that make me so angry to the point of hate. But I hated that time in our lives when they weren't here. And I would do anything to make sure that doesn't happen again.
Not many people find joy in simple conversations of 2K and Lebrons cramps the night before. Or in getting bad grades and being honest with people about it. That's something I share with my kids. Yes, I did terrible on this exam, or I had to ask for help in my geometry class. There is no point in telling them to do their best and then me not do the same. They keep me accountable. And they keep their Ms. Chloe in check you better believe it.
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I like Saturdays like today...
What I mean is, I like Saturdays when I am met with sleepy baby faces who woke up 5 minutes before I got there. Or the ones who climb in the van and lean forward to give you a quick hug around the neck. The ones where neighbors ask your name and say you're a good person even though they hardly know you, and you don't deserve it. When mommas can trust you and some of those little boys are taller than you. (I got a 5'11 13 year old body guard if anyone tries to mess with me!)
Saturday mornings where you forget the coffee but the singing in the background and giggling rejuvenates any tired muscle you once had. Jokes like "that's your girlfriend!" pointing to an older woman next to us and "did you see that Lamborghini?!" As they all claim it like it's theirs. Too many questions about my love life and college classes (they still wish I was at UK) dreaming and planning who will play for Coach Cal and the Miami Heat one day.
Getting to watch them have fun and be silly. Of course there are the complaints, and bad attitudes every now and then but it's nothing compared to those bright white smiles.
Adventures like breaking into a window or seeing who can rap each verse correctly. Oh and I love making fun of them about girls they like. I just got to be careful cause they are old enough now to get me back just as good.
Monday I will be reunited with even more of my kids. Brothers and sisters too. Some I've known for years, other I'll meet for the first time and welcome to the family. They will all have grown another foot, added or taken off braces, moved away etc. But I know once we see each other it will be hard to split us up again like it always is. They get on my last nerve but still many of us are joined at the hip haha.
They are my protectors, and where I see Jesus the most. Nothing could ever change that.
So here's to family reunions, Saturdays, summer camps, and a heart that's finding it's way back to where it beats like a drum and the rhythm makes sense.
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