When he asked me what the plan was I got nervous. I was excited don't get me wrong, but there was more going on than the one answer I could give. So in one long breath I told him - the good, the bad and, the ugly. That's how I was taught to live and love - my family won't let me forget it.
Staying here, in Knoxville this summer is most certainly one of the more grown up decisions I've ever had to make. And I can tell I'm already glad I said yes. And Gods timing is beautiful, hearing that I got the position with Emerald Youth Foundation eased the let down of not getting into Urban Plunge. As much as I will miss my beautiful Lexington, my friends, my family, and my kids... This is part of the process. This is something that I never planned... But He did.
I never would have imagined that telling her over lunch, that someone would overhear and remind me God has a plan much better than mine. It sounds so cheese ball but you don't just grow up considering yourself comparable to Jonah and constantly fight that feeling of running away or doing it your own way - and then your pastor tell you this sermon is for you - not once ever knowing that is how you feel. Jonah & Jesus - God has a plan SO much bigger.
That conversation was the reason I didn't get into the program I thought was so perfect. And the comfort and peace I feel over the situation is nothing like any peace I've ever felt before. Because I know that God knows I am just a silly little girl trying to run the show on my own.
So these are my early Monday morning thoughts. Still in bed. Coffee close by. A paper due at 5. And a heart and a head that just can't comprehend how amazing my God is. How beautiful the people in my life are.
And that I can still praise God anyway.
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